Could Indian Spirituality have helped Mother Teresa?

Could Indian Spirituality have helped Mother Teresa?

Mother Teresa has done unparalleled service to India. Could she also have benefited from the unparalleled spiritual wealth of India? Yes, definitely!

Although Mother Teresa lived in this ancient land of rich spiritual heritage, she stayed away from Indian spirituality and remained an island unto herself. It is not uncommon for spiritual seekers to lose sight of what is happening inside them when they get involved in serving others.

Whether many so-called religious people are really on the spiritual path itself is questionable. They neither acknowledge nor recognise the conflicts and agony that one faces on the spiritual path. Mother Teresa has been so sincere and honest to herself that she expressed what she was experiencing.


Serving others uplifts one’s energy, but it does not alleviate one from the inner torment. For that, one has to understand the mechanics of consciousness and their relation with pleasure or pain. This knowledge is found in many Indian scriptures such as the Upanishads, Yoga Vashistha, Ashtavakra Geeta and Tripura Rahasya.

All the states described in her letters are mentioned in the nine obstacles of yoga enunciated by Maharshi Patanjali.

Mother Teresa would have benefited immensely from Maharshi’s enunciations on how to face the obstacles of Vyadhi (ill-health), Styana (procrastination), Samshaya (doubt), Pramada (carelessness), Aalasya (laziness), Avirati (craving), Bhranti-darshana (confusion), Alabdha Bhumikatva (lack of any spiritual attainment) and Anavasthitva (emptiness or agonising state of mind).

Mother Teresa seemed to have gone through the agony of these states of consciousness without the knowledge of spiritual science. This is akin to a person suffering from malaria, not knowing what medicines to take.

What Mother Teresa experienced is not different from what many saints from different religions, including Sri Ram, went through. Sri Ram found his guidance from Maharshi Vashishtha in the form of Yoga Vashishta. In the scriptures it is said that

When orthodox beliefs limit us from looking beyond, it becomes an impediment on our spiritual journey.

One on the spiritual path should have an open mind and, at the same time, honour orthodoxy. Spirituality beyond the boundaries of a religion can help one to cope with loneliness, isolation and emptiness. It need not be seen as a betrayal of one’s own religion or philosophy.

Spiritual practices like yoga and meditation do not in any way conflict with one’s religious beliefs. Take the example of Father Bede Griffith who came to India and studied yoga and Vedanta philosophy in Trichy. These teachings helped him to overcome obstacles on the spiritual path while remaining true to his faith as a devout Christian monk.

Being orthodox, Mother Teresa perhaps thought she would be betraying Jesus if she searched for answers to her dilemma in Indian spirituality. A seeker has to keep the goal in front and if there is a block on the path, he or she has to find an alternative route to the goal.

When we see God as an object of perception, that is when we are totally lost and misery follows. From the scene to the seer, from the object of perception to the perceiver… that shift of consciousness makes all the difference on the spiritual journey. This is how the real joy, which is the nature of consciousness, gets kindled. And all the barriers, mental blocks and intellectual inhibitions that our understanding imposes can be transcended by experiencing the precepts of Vedanta.

It is unfortunate that people are not open in their thinking. I am sure that just a few sessions of pranayama and meditation would have helped Mother Teresa to overcome those days of darkness and inner torment. Thousands of seekers on the spiritual path experience this state, but they overcome it once they practise dhyana.

The Indian philosophy talks of three types of misery – physical, mental and spiritual. Spiritual torment is the worst. The agony and torment that one experiences is at the level of the mind and to go beyond the mind, go beyond thoughts, is the very purpose of samadhi.

Unless one knows how to quieten the mind, it is impossible to achieve inner peace.

The mind can be transcended through yoga sadhana. Yoga is not asanas alone; pranayama and meditation are an integral part of it. Patanjali Yoga Darshan, Adi Shankara’s Drig Drishya Viveka, Vigyan Bhairav Tantra of Kashmir Shaivism, Thirumandiram of Saint Thirumula all offer different techniques that help one overcome spiritual torment and misery.

Ayurveda, yoga and Vedanta respectively are the three remedies to eliminate mala (impurities in the body) vikshepa (disturbances in mind) and avarna (veil that covers the light within). While ayurveda helps people to calm their thoughts, pranayama and meditation help one become happy from the core of their Being.

Happiness is only a sign of connection with the divinity deep within. Through these Vedantic practices, you can experience the scintillating consciousness that you are. It is a simple recognition of what is and has always been in us, and with us, as our self.

The basic principle of Vedanta is that what you are seeking is already there, like the air around you. You don’t have to go somewhere searching; you only need to become aware. In the same way divinity, or the consciousness, bliss, love, is already present in you; it is only a matter of recognising it.

Scientific temper and Vedantic knowledge together make one whole and bring inner stillness. And that is the essence of Indian spirituality. Critics often ask what use is spirituality if the underprivileged are not taken care of. What they fail to see is that wherever there is genuine spirituality, a component of seva or service has always been attached to it.

In the realm of consciousness, as you sow so shall you reap. If you think suffering is an important tool for uniting with God, then you are bound to attract it. If you sow a seed of suffering, that multiplies. The lack of experience of dhyana (meditation) and samadhi (equanimity) can keep a seeker morose and dull. To overcome this, one needs a shift in understanding about heaven and hell, and about the consciousness that is all pervading. Spirituality alone can bring that shift.

In the Eastern philosophy, experience comes first and then faith follows. In the occidental way of thinking, belief comes first and then experience. Mother Teresa had faith but was struggling for an experience. And it was experience which turned atheist Vivekananda into a swami. Ironically, Kolkata witnessed both in the same century!


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When a person dies, many things can happen to them. I choose to believe that a deceased person has the ability to come back to Earth without taking a physical form. They do this for a lot of reasons but the basic idea behind most of these ideas is that they are attempting to pass along a message.

As they have not taken a physical forms they can only communicate through no direct means. The fact that you are reading this articles says a lot about your willingness to stay open and listen.

Here are some of the common ways that spirits try to talk to us. If any of these are happening you try to look past your fear of the unknown and listen to your gut.

There are many tricksters out there and only your intuition can guide you effectively.

You Vivid Dreams or Visions During Meditation
Spirits are best known for trying to reach us through dreams and meditation. This is when our minds are quiet and we are more open to the possibilities. They will create scenarios or characters that grab at our attention.

When you are dreaming especially, you are aligned with other realms o it is easier for spirits to speak to you. Before you meditate or sleep is ask for guidance with sincerity and deliberation.

Your Sense Are Sharper, More Enhanced
Spirits have to communicate through indirect means so they will sharpen your senses so you may notice more.

You’ll see them on the edge of your vision, or smell a flower that reminds you of someone deceased.

Often at first you won’t know what you are seeing, but remain calm and open to the experience.

Electronics Randomly Act Up
We’ve all seen this in movies, but that doesn’t make it untrue. Electronics turning on and off, volumes going out of wack or televisions sets get static and change channels. This phenomena will continue until you directly address the situation.

You Know Things You Can’t Explain
Ever got the feeling you knew something that you had no memory of learning? This could be a spirit telepathically popping information to you.

You will need this information so stay open to its existence or you will shut it out.

Also spirits can lead our intuitions. So listen to your gut as it may lead you to unknown places. Have faith in your spirit guides.

You Get Frequent And Random Chills
If ever you are talking about the deceased, or a situation involving the dead, and you get a chilling sensation, that could be a clear indication of spirits. While this isn’t always the most pleasant of sensations remember they are on a different wavelength now. So don’t be afraid when this happens, the spirits are trying to guide you.

You Feel Like You’re Being Guided
Something is pulling you in a direction, and your intuition can’t make sense of it.

At the same time your gut isn’t fighting the sensation, the whole thing is off putting because it is unfamiliar.

This is one or more of your spirits trying to take you to a place you need to be or reveal something that is hidden to you. Relax and prepare for an adventure!

This article has been republished from Spirit Science,


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When They Come Back to You, Please Don’t Take Them Back

When They Come Back to You, Please Don’t Take Them Back


It will be amazing at first. A rush of emotions, a sense of peace and satisfaction – all at the same time. They will give you a feeling that no one else could so far. All your senses will come to life. Your soul will feel alive again – like a little kid again seeing the world for the first time.

For the first time in a very long time, you will feel whole. You’ll feel like life makes sense again.

But before you know what is happening, it will happen all at once – that other facet of their personality, the one that almost broke you, it will show up. It will always show up. It will leave you confused, burnt, and worst of all, worst of all it will make you feel trapped, angry at yourself for allowing this to happen again. You never, ever have to feel like that.
Please, don’t forget about all the nights you cried till you had no tears left. Don’t ever forget about why you broke up. Don’t forget about how they spun you around in their toxicity and drowned you in all their issues.

Don’t ever forget about that pain, that excruciating pain they caused that left you so torn that you felt helpless. Don’t ever forget that someone who cares about, loves you, will never ever do anything to hurt you. And say they do love you, say they do care, then that is even worse. That means they will always love themselves more. That means that they still haven’t worked out their issues and until they have, you will always be their emotional punching bag.

They will always use you to feel good because you are amazing and strong and they know you love them so much – they know you will always take them back.
When they left, you knew somewhere in your heart that it was actually the most positive thing. You knew subconsciously that you were lucky that this person was no longer a part of your life because you opened yourself up for someone new, someone better, a more extraordinary love, someone who deserves you. Someone who always lifts you up, and not just on the days when they’re in a good mood, when it’s convenient for them.

You deserve someone who doesn’t give you internal conflicts. Someone who never leaves when things get hard, when life becomes complicated, when you’re lost and confused and aren’t sure of what to do next. Someone who never leaves when you get caught in the rain, someone who never gets swayed no matter how many people are trying to get their attention, because in their heart they know that what they have with you comes once in a lifetime.

I know you love them, and I know that they may have even lifted you up when you were doubting yourself. I know they were your best friend. I know that you told them all about your past, about all the people that hurt you. About all the things you did that you’re ashamed of, all the things you don’t like about yourself, all the things that make you, you – and they wiped away your tears and kissed those parts of yourself that you’ve never showed to anyone.

They loved your heart and this is why it’s so hard not to take them back. You had something special, and that connection will always be there. I know.
But I also know that they wanted things their way – that when you started to challenge them, that’s when the problems started. I know that after all was said and done, they left you broken. I know that you broke up for a reason. I know about all the pain they caused you, about all the lies and all the times you hated yourself for putting up with their toxicity.

So when they come back, and they will, please remember all of this. Because I promise you, when someone is selfish, when someone has destroyed you and your happiness once – they will always, always do it again.

Leave your life open for a love that you deserve – I promise you, it’s out there.

Source –


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Highly Intelligent People Are A Bunch Of Messy, Cursing Night Owls

Highly Intelligent People Are A Bunch Of Messy, Cursing Night Owls


Hell yeah we are!

For the first time in the history of forever, our moms were wrong.

Growing up I’m sure we’ve all had shared experiences about being demanded to clean our rooms, getting yelled out for muttering “shit” under our breath and forced into bed at 9 p.m. Collectively our parents told us that these things were bad, and we had to learn not to do them.

Well a few recent studies determined that those hour-long lectures were kinda full of shit.
Science has finally given us something to take back to our parents that isn’t a C on a report card. Recent studies have shown that people who swear a lot, stay up late and have messy desks are actually more intelligent than most (a.k.a you do-gooders with tidy rooms and clean mouths who never missed curfew).

So if you were always accidentally dropping the f-bomb in front of mom and dad, it’s not because you’re the cool rebel you thought you were. A study last year found that people who swear actually have a greater vocabulary then people who don’t, AND tend to be more confident. Fuck yeah.

Messy rooms that were once a sign of a disorganized and unproductive life, may be seen as a sign of intelligence. A few years ago, researchers found that people who worked at a messy desk generated more interesting and creative ideas and a willingness to break out of unconventional norms.

So next time someone tells you to clean up, politely remind that them that the week-old bag of Doritos on your desk is necessary for your creative brain.

And finally, scientific tests proved that night owls showed the kind of smarts that lead to prestigious job titles and higher incomes. In other words, things you can brag about at your next high school reunion when everyone remembers you as the kid who was always sleeping in second period.

So if your mom is STILL trying to give you shit for just being the badass, foul-mouthed, messy, late-night babe you are, then it might be time to send her back to science class. You have every right to feel confident for being just who you are.

Source –
Written by Emily Blackwood

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The Problem is Your Thinking

The Problem is Your Thinking


The problem is not the problem. The problem is your attitude about the problem. Do you understand?”-Captain Jack Sparrow

Have you ever been really excited and passionate while contemplating a big life change, or something new for yourself in general?

How often are your considerations met with instant internal arguing?

What about when you KNOW something is the right choice, but you still have a very hard time getting to a place where you can comfortably start taking action?

This is a very common issue for many people, and it almost always boils down to a flawed assessment of the situation at hand.

To put it simply: the problem lies in your mindset, attitude, and/or “vibe” regarding how to approach and solve said problem.

Thankfully, there’s a way to fix this issue, and it all comes down to expanding your current level of consciousness.

Unconscious Stumbling Blocks

What you’re actually experiencing (when you feel stuck while trying to get into action) is an unconscious “block”.

Unconscious means you’re currently unaware of what’s preventing you fromallowing yourself to take on specific goals.

You feel a bit intimidated, even in the contemplation stage. The goal might feel just a bit too large for you to bite into. This is perfectly natural, and can even be used to your advantage – if you commit to becoming consciously aware of the mental games you’re playing with yourself. We all play these mental games.

The more conscious you become, the more you realize that all of your excuses are irrelevant.

They begin and end within you.

You make them, you can break them.

People often look outside of themselves for the “permission slips” that they think they need before they can start making serious self-changes. This is a fool’s errand. It’s not actually a permission slip you’re seeking; it’s permission to not need a permission slip any longer.

Permission begins and ends within oneself.

Every single thing your mind can come up with to convince you “why you should or shouldn’t do something” is in reality just an inner tug of war with yourself.

When you become conscious of this fact, you immediately regain control over your own thoughts and behavior.

How crazy it is to think that so many people live their lives on auto-pilot?


Either they allow their first impression of something to immediately dictate the climate of their own thinking, or they’ll quickly rationalize away something that would actually increase their level of personal power. This is most often out offear due to a lack of understanding. Fear due to a lack of conscious awareness. You cannot understand that which you’re not even aware of. You don’t know what you don’t know.

This is where it’s important to become conscious of the difference between having to trick/convince yourself that you need to “suck it up” and tolerate work and activities that deep down aren’t fulfilling (yet you’ve been conditioned to accept due to a lack of conscious awareness that you have other choices), and adopting a path of sincere and challenging growth – one that actually aligns with your highest personal values, aspirations, and goals.

The Difference is Progressive Personal Consciousness Development

All there is, is choice. Everything is a natural consequence of choice.

The only difference is between people who allow external factors to influence their choices, and those who are conscious of this information, and commit to making their own choices based on their ever-expanding internal power – regardless of what others think.

There are people who allow external factors to influence their thinking, and thus become the reasons why they make certain choices.

The why portion of the equation is where they slip up.

Such people are the first to complain that things are never going their way, or how they just can’t get ahead. It’s always someone else’s fault. They refuse to take conscious responsibility, so their choices and results are naturally less than optimal. Since they insist that reality is all “out there”, they’re never in control.

It’s very hard to have control of your life when you believe such control is impossible to obtain in the first place. This is the state of learned helplessness.

Leave someone else in charge of the important choices, and you’ll suffer theirconsequences.

Then, there are those who are conscious of this behavior, realize how foolish and self-limiting it is, and commit to making their own choices – regardless of whether others approve or support.

Even when they aren’t getting results yet, they’ll still be taking action. These people consciously understand that the real battle is all in their own minds. Action is all that’s required to start getting results. These results may not be what you initially had in mind, but you’re completely free to keep taking action until your results start aligning with what you’re after.

This is an incredibly empowering mindset and attitude to hold toward life in general.

Conscious people understand that literally nothing can stop them…except forthemselves.

In truth, however, living consciously isn’t easy. That’s precisely why so few people strive to do so.

Do you know what else isn’t easy? Getting knocked down over and over in life – especially while chasing goals that other people have convinced you are of importance, all while your true passion and fulfillment internally screams at you to “turn the ship around!” over and over and over again.

Don’t get discouraged or demotivated though. Paying attention to your choices, behaviors, and actions can indeed feel like a chore at first. In both the above circumstances, the escape rope is reminding yourself that you have freewill choice.

Life can get incredibly fun the more you commit to making conscious choices.

Creating this website and writing this article were conscious choices for me, and I’m having a blast! Embracing my passion of conveying concepts of consciousness, growth, and empowerment to others; I can’t see myself doing anything else!

Stop Looking For Permission!

The “secret” is to get past those unconscious stumbling blocks by allowingyourself to take action toward your highest excitement.

You don’t need a reason to do so.

Thinking you need a reason is precisely what your initial problem was.

We tend to fool ourselves into believing we need some sort of external “permission” to get started chasing our dreams.

You might think you can’t start until you have more money saved, or your boss gives you permission to take time off. The truth is, you don’t need anyone’s permission to start going after your highest excitement.

Permission begins and ends within oneself.

Simply work on becoming more conscious of the types of actions you’re already taking.

Then, adjust your course of action, gauge the results, and learn to fall in love with the process.

It’s infinitely more noble to adopt a life path of exciting self-discovery and growth – one that can lead you to assist others in doing the same for themselves – than it is to accept and perpetuate soul-crushing, trivial, redundant, close-minded, fear-driven “work” under the guise of social acceptance and “correctness”.

By empowering yourself, you remove the chains that so many are convinced are necessary to live a “proper life” here on planet Earth. People cling to misery as if it were part of their identity. Heaven forbid that some people become conscious of this stuff, and choose to start making better choices for themselves!

People hate being reminded that their lives are essentially on a treadmill, and that they’re free to step off at any time. The only difference between them and YOU is that you’re armed with the power of conscious awareness, which gives you the understanding that in truth, there are no limits – only choice of individual perception.

Remember, choice is all there is…so choose consciously, my wonderful friends! :)

– Jason Demakis
This article has been republished from Raise Your

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31 Life-Changing Bruce Lee Quotes On Happiness, Love, God, Truth, Failure, Death, & More

31 Life-Changing Bruce Lee Quotes On Happiness, Love, God, Truth, Failure, Death, & More


Most people know Bruce Lee because of his acting career and his tremendous skills in martial arts, but only few know and understand the depth of wisdom he had achieved.

Below is a collection of some of my favorite life-changing quotes from the great martial arts master and teacher Bruce Lee on topics such as happiness and love, God and truth, mistakes and failure, death and immortality.

“I’m not in this world to live up to your expectations and you’re not in this world to live up to mine.”

“If you spend too much time thinking about a thing, you’ll never get it done.”

“Don’t fear failure. — Not failure, but low aim, is the crime. In great attempts, it is glorious even to fail.”

“Empty your mind, be formless. Shapeless, like water. If you put water into a cup, it becomes the cup. You put water into a bottle and it becomes the bottle. You put it in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Now, water can flow or it can crash. Be water, my friend.”

“Be happy, but never satisfied.”

“A goal is not always meant to be reached, it often serves simply as something to aim at.”

“To hell with circumstances; I create opportunities.”

“Be like water making its way through cracks. Do not be assertive, but adjust to the object, and you shall find a way around or through it. If nothing within you stays rigid, outward things will disclose themselves.

“Do not pray for an easy life, pray for the strength to endure a difficult one.”

“Adapt what is useful, reject what is useless, and add what is specifically your own.”

“Mistakes are always forgivable, if one has the courage to admit them.”

“A wise man can learn more from a foolish question than a fool can learn from a wise answer.”

“Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.”

“If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them.”

“Knowing is not enough, we must apply. Willing is not enough, we must do.”

“The key to immortality is first living a life worth remembering.”

“The doubters said,
‘Man can not fly,’
The doers said,
‘Maybe, but we’ll try’
And finally soared
In the morning glow
While non-believers
Watched from below.”

“I fear not the man who has practiced 10,000 kicks once, but I fear the man who had practiced one kick 10,000 times.”

“It is not a daily increase, but a daily decrease. Hack away at the inessentials.”

“Not being tense but ready.
Not thinking but not dreaming.
Not being set but flexible.
Liberation from the uneasy sense of confinement.
It is being wholly and quietly alive, aware and alert, ready for whatever may come.”

“The great mistake is to anticipate the outcome of the engagement; you ought not to be thinking of whether it ends in victory or defeat. Let nature take its course, and your tools will strike at the right moment.”

“Forget about winning and losing; forget about pride and pain. Let your opponent graze your skin and you smash into his flesh; let him smash into your flesh and you fracture his bones; let him fracture your bones and you take his life! Do not be concerned with escaping safely- lay your life before him!!”

“A quick temper will make a fool of you soon enough.”

“If you don’t want to slip up tomorrow, speak the truth today.”

“If there is a God, he is within. You don’t ask God to give you things, you depend on God for your inner theme.”

“A good teacher protects his pupils from his own influence. ”

“You must be shapeless, formless, like water. When you pour water in a cup, it becomes the cup. When you pour water in a bottle, it becomes the bottle. When you pour water in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Water can drip and it can crash. Become like water my friend.”

“Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successful personality and duplicate it.”

“Use only that which works, and take it from any place you can find it.”

“Notice that the stiffest tree is most easily cracked, while the bamboo or willow survives by bending with the wind.”

“Empty your cup so that it may be filled; become devoid to gain totality.”

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Thanks to The Unbounded Spirit for this article

The 5 Uncommon Strengths of the Emotionally Neglected

The 5 Uncommon Strengths of the Emotionally Neglected


With their heads held high but their spirits lower than should be, they walk among us.
“I don’t need any help,” they say with a smile.

But “what do you need?” they ask others with genuine interest.

Loved and respected by all who know them, they struggle to love and respect themselves.

These are the people of Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN).

What is Childhood Emotional Neglect, or CEN? It’s a simple but powerful force in the life of a child. All it takes is growing up in a household where your feelings don’t matter enough.

Typically, I write about the special challenges of the emotionally neglected, such as self-blame, self-directed anger, and low self-compassion. That’s because I want to help the people of CEN overcome them.

But truth be told, the emotionally neglected are some of the strongest adults I have ever met.

Yes, it’s hard to believe, but there is a bright side to growing up emotionally ignored.

So now I’d like to highlight the particular strengths you likely have if you grew up this way.

The Five Uncommon Strengths of the Emotionally Neglected

Independent: Growing up you knew, even though it was perhaps never said out loud, that you were essentially on your own. Problem with a teacher? You solved it. Conflict with a friend? You figured it out yourself. Your childhood was a training ground for self-sufficiency. Now, as an adult, you prefer to do things yourself. Because you’re so very competent, the great thing is that for the most part, you can.
Compassionate: As a child your feelings were far too often ignored. But that probably didn’t stop you from feeling for others. Research has shown that even young babies feel empathy. I have noticed that many people who were emotionally neglected in childhood have decreased access to their own feelings, but extra sensitivity to other people’s feelings. Compassion is a powerful, healing, and bonding force. And you have it in spades.
Giving: Having received a dearth of emotional acknowledgment and validation in childhood, you learned not to ask for things. Part of being independent and compassionate is that you are more aware of others’ needs than you are of your own. So now as an adult, you don’t ask for a lot, but you do give a lot.
Flexible: As a child, you were probably not often consulted. Instead of being asked what you wanted or needed, you had no choice but to adjust to the situation at hand. So now, all grown up, you’re not demanding, pushy or controlling. Instead, you’re the opposite. You can go with the flow far better than most people. And you do.
Likable: The people of Childhood Emotional Neglect are some of the most likable in this world. Compassionate, giving and selfless, you are the one your friends seek out when they need help, advice or support. You are there for your family and friends, and maybe even strangers too. Others know that they can rely on you. Are you ever puzzled about why people like you? It’s because you have these five unmistakably lovable qualities.
Many CEN people are secretly aware of their great strength, and value it in themselves.

I don’t need help,
I don’t need anything,
I can handle it,
I’ll take care of it,
I’ll be fine with whatever you decide,
I’m strong,
they say.
If this is true of you, the idea of changing yourself can be frightening. You don’t want to feel dependent on anyone, including a therapist, friend or spouse. You’re afraid of appearing needy, or weak, or helpless. You have a grave fear of becoming selfish.

But here is the beauty of CEN: Your strengths are so enduring that you can make them even better by balancing them.

So you remain independent, but you lose your fear of depending on someone when you need to.

You remain as competent as you’ve always been, but you’re OK with asking for help when you need it.

You stay flexible and can go with the flow, but you are also aware and mindful of your own needs.

You can still handle things.

You’re just as strong as ever.

More balanced and more open, you’re still loved and respected by all who know you.

And the great thing is that now you also love and respect yourself.

To learn more about Childhood Emotional Neglect, how it happens, and how to balance the effects to live a happy and healthy life, see and the book Running on Empty.

By Jonice Webb PhD

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If You Have To Force It, Leave It Alone: Not Everyone You Lose Is A Loss

If You Have To Force It, Leave It Alone: Not Everyone You Lose Is A Loss


When something is broken, fix it. That’s what we’re always told, isn’t it?

But, what if that isn’t the answer? What if it’s better to cut our losses in search of something better and more rewarding?

Letting people go is a hard life hack to master, purely because we’re a society of clingers. We try so desperately to hold on to things even when they’ve served us beyond their purpose.

Losing people is a natural part of growing up, but when we’re encompassed in a society that is constantly changing, we’re led to believe that everyone we lose is a loss.

Society brainwashes us into thinking that nothing positive can amount from losing someone who meant everything to us. Every friendship and relationship is a learning curve, so instead of mourning the people who aren’t present, we should celebrate filtering people out who no longer serve as support.

Loss can be one of the most painful feelings to endure but over time, the pain lessens and our eyes are opened to the fact that we don’t actually need that person anymore.

It might not seem like it at the time, but good things end so great things can happen.

We, as individuals, have the mental capacity to judge who has a positive impact on our lives, meaning someone can only be defined as a loss if we choose to define them as one.

Regardless of the circumstances, everything happens for a reason. Even though it might not seem like it at the time, there’s an explanation as to why that person isn’t in our lives anymore.

It might bring sadness, heartache and regret, but each loss takes us on a journey which makes us stronger.

Picking up the pieces, planting a smile on our faces and finding comfort in the fact that things will get better is the first step toward learning to be truly happy on our own. Because, what’s the point in wasting our time and energy on people who remain standstill?

If someone enriches our experiences and shapes our memories, they might be worthy of our time. And if not? So be it. We need to stop trying to force things because we’re scared to be without someone. We need to stop clinging on to things just because we don’t remember ourselves without them.

And we need to stop worrying, and believe that things will be okay in the end. If things aren’t okay, it’s not the end.

If someone doesn’t treat us how we deserve, we shouldn’t accept their behavior just because it’s what we think we deserve. We don’t have to settle.

People have an unhealthy habit of hurting the ones closest to them, but we can choose not to fall victim to that. We don’t have to deal with being in a constant state of angst or worry because we should never discredit our instincts.

Our bodies pick up vibrations, and if something deep inside us says something isn’t right about a situation or a person, we need to trust it. Acting on gut feeling and intuition instead of emotion and persuasion is the best way to decide who can stay and who needs to go.

While it’s hard to accept that not everyone who enters our life is meant to stay, we as human beings are built to encounter new people. We’re designed to explore, discover and grow, and not be held back by people who don’t have the same capacity as us.

So when we feel like we’re falling apart, we need to remind ourselves how that person made us feel. Not when we were naively content, but when we were achingly sad and bitterly confused.

Life is too short to be anything but happy, so we need to learn to surround ourselves with people who matter. We either grow with, or grow apart from people, and if it doesn’t feel right, it might be best to let it go.

People will become strangers and distant memories, but we don’t ever have to feel guilty about removing toxic people from our lives.

Nobody has the right to infect us with negativity and doubt. There will come a point in life when we’ll get tired of having to prove ourselves and we’ll get bored of trying to fix things.

It’s not giving up; it’s realizing we deserve more. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with putting ourselves first for once, and the sooner we do that, the better.

Because, after all, our broken moments don’t define us. It’s how we deal with them that does. 

Written by Nicole Cottrell
Originally published on Elite Daily


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Fun Personality Test – Pick A Tree – MIND GAME

Fun Personality Test – Pick A Tree – MIND GAME


This is an interesting personality test. Look at the trees and choose the one that is immediately most appealing to you. Don’t think too long, just choose.

Tree 1.

A generous and moral. You aspire to be the best. You have the highest ambitions and standards. People may seem to you that it is difficult, but the hardest thing to you with yourself. You work hard, but you’re not selfish. You work because you want to make the world a better place. You like as long as you do not hurt. And after … still do not cease to love. Very few people can appreciate all that you do.

Tree 2.

You are a fun, honest person. You are very responsible and like taking care of others. You believe in putting in an honest day’s work and accept many work-related responsibilities. You have a very good personality and people come to trust you easily. You are bright, witty and fast-thinking. You always have an interesting story to tell.

Tree 3.

A smart and thoughtful. You are a great thinker. Your thoughts and ideas – the most important. Do you like to think about his theories and views alone. Are you an introvert. You get along with those who likes to think and learn. You are never superficial. You spend a lot of time, thinking about morality. You are trying to do what is right, even if the majority of society does not agree with you.

Tree 4.

Insightful and philosophical. You are very unique, one of a kind soul. There’s no one even slightly similar to you. You are intuitive and a bit quirky. You are often misunderstood and it hurts you. You need personal space. Your creativity needs to be developed. You are a person who clearly sees the light and dark sides of life. You are very emotional.

Tree 5.

You are self-assured and in charge. You are very independent. Your guiding principle in life is ‘I’ll do it my way.’. You are very self-reliant and know how to stay strong for yourself and the people you love. You know exactly what you want and are not afraid of pursuing your dreams. The only thing you demand from people is honesty. You are strong enough to accept the truth.

Tree 6.

Kind and sensitive. You can easily build a relationship with people. You have a lot of friends, and you like to make their lives better. You have a warm and bright aura. People feel extremely relaxed in your presence. Every day you are thinking how to become even better. You are interesting, insightful and unique. You need love more than anyone in the world. You are ready to love those who didn’t love you in return.

Tree 7.

This is an interesting personality test. Look at the trees and choose the one that is immediately most appealing to you. Don’t think too long, just choose.Happy and calm. You are sensitive and a understanding person. You listen carefully and without judgment. You think everyone has their own path in life. You can easily take the events and people. You rarely worried and often times feel very relaxed. Always have a good time while not losing my own way.

Tree 8.

You are charming and energetic. You are a fun person who knows how to make people laugh. You live in a state of harmony with the universe. You are spontaneous and enthusiastic. You never say no to an adventure. Often, you end up surprising and even shocking people. But that’s just how you are. . . You always remain true to yourself. You have many interests and if something proves of interest to you, you will not rest until you acquire a profound knowledge of this area. I think ,many people want to be like you.

Tree 9.

Full of optimism and lucky. Do you believe that life – it is a gift, and you’re trying to do as much as possible and use as many as possible of what you have been given. You are immensely proud of what have made in life. With those you love, are willing to share all the joys and sorrows. You have a very healthy outlook on life. You can see that the glass (at least) half full. You are using every opportunity to forgive, learn and grow. Life is too short to do anything else.


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Are you an Empath or HSP?

Are you an Empath or HSP?


Empath: A person who is capable of feeling the emotions or physical symptoms of others even if they themselves are not going through the same situation or events.

Highly Sensitive: Used to describe a person who has high sensory awareness and often feels extremely emotional or in-tune with their surroundings.

It is estimated that around 15-20 percent of the population is highly sensitive and another 2-3 percent of the population are empaths.

The term “empath” has been growing in popularity however, many are confused about what it actually means and mistaken it to describe someone who is highly sensitive.

Being an empath is really like having clairsentient abilities whereas being a highly sensitive individual is more about enhanced sensory awareness.

To put it simply- empaths pick on up energy whereas highly sensitive people pick up on sensory stimuli.

The difference is important because those who are highly sensitive can learn to protect their energy using various mindfulness tools however, empaths really need to learn how to harness their talents and channel them into something deeper.

So, what are the traits of an Empath?

People feel comfortable telling you their personal stories and often comment how good they feel after talking to you, but you usually feel worse after talking to them.
You experience aches and pains that are also being experienced by your loved ones or the people around you.
When you are around others, you can pick up on certain energies and emotions, however when you are on your own, you feel a sense of calm and normality.
You have trouble concentrating when others are around, or you feel overwhelmed easily when hanging around others, especially in crowded places.
Some people appear to be intimidated by you as they can feel that you can see right through them.
You understand or comprehend a lot of what others are going through and seem to know more than you were verbally told.
You can instantly detect and absorb the emotions of others and feel them on a physical level.
When you are around certain people you find yourself acting out of character or doing things you wouldn’t normally do.
You have a hard time navigating through your own feelings and emotions and working out why you feel a certain way.
You feel a certain way but have no idea why, only to find out that someone close to you is going through the same emotions.
In Astrology, empaths usually have their Moon in a water sign or another sensitive placement.
Compare these to the traits of a Highly Sensitive Person:

You feel your emotions or the emotions of others on a deeper level.
You have the tendency to be more reactive than normal in emotional situations. Many might accuse you of being overly dramatic or that you need to calm down.
You tend to take things very personally and are easily offended or disgruntled by other people’s thoughts and actions.
You prefer to do things on your own and avoid hanging out in groups.
You have a harder time making decisions because you are more aware of the possible outcomes.
You have the ability to notice the finer details in your surroundings are are often sensitive to noise, colors and other stimuli.
You have a hard time watching scary or violent movies and are easily moved by emotional scenes.
You have tendency to cry more often and can sometimes be triggered to cry when others are crying.
You are often more polite and conscientious than normal due to the fact that you are more aware of your surroundings.
Often there is a propensity to developing anxiety, especially in social situations.
In Astrology, a highly sensitive person usually has many planets in water signs.
Whether you resonate with being an empath or a highly sensitive person (or a bit of both), there are ways you can calm your feelings such as learning some mindfulness tools, practicing meditation and setting firm boundaries with others.

As an empath however, you may find these practices a little more challenging. Instead, you may benefit from working on an energetic level rather than an emotional or psychological one.

Try cleansing your etheric body often using sage, carrying around a protective crystal, or perhaps even seek out different forms of energy healing. You can also channel your abilities into psychic awareness or development.

Being an empath or highly sensitive person is definitely something that you can use to your advantage and the more you begin to master your abilities, the easier they will be to manage.

At the end of the day, we are all effected by the emotions, thoughts and feelings of others whether we realize it or not. Our energy is not limited to the containers of our physical body and the more we tap into this idea and grow in awareness, the more we can use it towards realizing our potential.

Written by Tanaaz Chubb

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